He Graciously Reveals

I am amazed by God more and more everyday. I am going to be blatantly honest...it has been emotionally an extremely rough week/weekend for me. I don't know if everything has finally just hit me, or if I put on such a "strong" face that I hide from myself how I really am feeling, or maybe I just finally became weak.

 Marriage is hard and challenging regardless, but when you add being a military wife to the picture things become even more challenging. Being thousands of miles away from your spouse and living your marriage through a text message, computer screen (where you have a bad Internet connection that cuts out all of the time), or through short phone calls once a week it can take a major toll on you. I began praying last night for strength, and while taking a shower this morning I just started talking to God like a commonly do. I asked him to please give me strength. I told him I was so grateful that I was getting to move to Korea, and I wasn't sure why I was becoming so weak now. I asked him to allow me to pull through this month and to allow me to remember the love my husband and I have for one another. Thankfully, as He always does, He graciously revealed to me exactly what I needed to hear.

Everybody keeps telling me I'm such a lucky man,
Looking at you standing there I know I am.
Barefooted beauty with eyes that blue, sunshine sure looks good on you, I swear.

Oh I can't believe I finally found ya baby,
Happy ever after after all this time.
Oh there's gonna be some ups and downs,
But with you to wrap my arms around, I'm fine.
Chorus:
So baby hold on tight, and don't let go.
Hold on to the love we're making,
Cause baby when the ground starts shaking you gotta know,
When you got a good thing.
Verse 2:
You know you keep on bringing out the best in me,
And I need you now even more than the air I breathe.

You can make me laugh when I wanna cry,
This will last forever I just know. I know.

Chorus:
So baby hold on tight, and don't let go.
Hold on to the love we're making,
Cause baby when the ground starts shaking you gotta know,
When you got a good thing.
Bridge:
We got a good thing baby, woah.

So hold on tight, baby don't let go.
Hold on to the love we're making,
Cause baby when the ground starts shaking you gotta know,
Oh you gotta know, oh you gotta know, you gotta know,
When you got a good thing.

As soon as I got out the shower mine and Colts first dance, When You Got A Good Thing, came on my iPod. God quickly began to reveal to me that He never promised it would be easy, He just promised that He will be by my side and lead the way. I quickly remembered that no matter how draining it can be living your marriage through a text message that the love my husband and I share is rare and wonderful. I quickly remembered that our memories and our amazing love is what makes the hard times worth it.

Then, I went to church and God continued to speak straight to me. He reminded me that although I am in charge of my life  He is  ultimately in control of my life. Although I know I will be moving to Korea on April 1st I still get fearful that something awful might happen. Maybe the Army will change their mind at the last minute or some crazy incident will happen where they tell me I cant come. God spoke to me so clearly and reminded me that all I can do is pack boxes, hire movers, put my stuff into storage, collect all my important documents, pack my bags, go to the airport and trust in Him that I will actually get on that plane and fly away. He reminded me that all I can do is be in charge of the current situation and get things accomplished, but ultimately He is in control of my life and the outcome.

I remember that although I am so trusting in God and His promise for my life that I was still sinning by being "fearful". God makes it clear that I should not fear but trust in Him. Finally, at church I was reminded that I should NEVER underestimate God's favor. Favor is when God fights for you. Favor is when God does for you what you could never do for yourself. I was reminded that God wants to fight for my husband and I. I know God wants to fight for our marriage. I was once again reminded that He has everything planned out perfectly and I needed to QUIT worrying (which anyone who knows me well knows that is something I have a hard time doing).

It does not matter how strong you may be or how positive you are, life can still take a toll on you. Thankfully, I have a wonderful Heavenly Father that so graciously reveals to me during those moments of weakness that He is still in control and is here for me.

No matter how disconnected thousands of miles might make you feel from someone, what truly matters is the love that you share and knowing that amazing love will never fail you...and neither will an amazing God who is fighting for your marriage every step of the way. Because of that I am thankful and confident that I will sure enough get on that plane.

The Power of God's Favor

Yesterday during my devotion I read this:

"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life."

 -Psalm 23:6

Joel Osteen wrote, "David continued to live favor minded, expecting goodness and mercy all the days of his life. This morning instead of expecting to get the short end of the stick in life, why not start expecting God's blessings to chase after you? Instead of expecting to barley get by in life, start expecting the goodness of God to overtake you."

I was overwhelmed by this devotion because of God's favor in mine and Colts marriage. Colt and I have been praying for almost 2 months now, begging God for his favor, expecting goodness, and asking him to give us mercy and somehow allow us to be together.

Last week Colt and I received the amazing news. The Army has approved for me to move to Korea non sponsored. We were ecstatic! Since then there has not been a day that has gone by that I haven't said out loud, "Thank you God! Thank you so much for allowing this to happen. Thank you for protecting mine and Colts marriage. Thank you for allowing everything to work out perfectly."

I have been so fearful that we would hear the word "No" and that things wouldn't work out for us. After reading this devotion I was reminded that God wants all things to work together for our good. I was reminded that I should expect nothing less than for our Heavenly Father to take care of us. I was reminded that if possible, God wants married couples to be together because that is how it should be.

Like David, Colt and I have been living favor minded. Trusting that God would allow us to be together and would give us goodness and mercy in our marriage. We could not be more thankful for the amazing work that our Lord and Savior is doing in our life and marriage right now.

Through this experience I have also gotten a glimpse of what the "Army Family" truly consist of. Colt meet an amazing couple in Korea that have opened their arms to us. They have went above and beyond what we could of ever imagined or expected to help us out, and make this process as smooth as possible. From paper work, visas, shots, immunization records, medical records, housing, packing, what to bring, what not to bring, do's, dont's, schedules, jobs, and even picking me up from the airport when I arrive...they have helped us with it all! Their kindness and generosity meas so much to Colt and I! We only hope that one day soon we will have the opportunity to help other couples the way this couple has helped us.

Also, my teachers at Brenau University have been extremley helpful. Thanks to my wonderful advisor, who has so graciously offered to help me through the process, I will be able to continue taking classes and going to school while living in Korea! I will be taking online classes over the Summer and independent study classes in the Fall.

We are so fully of joy and excited about this new journey and opportunity that God has brought to our lives. We just want to thank everyone who has helped us out and made this possible. Most of all we thank our Heavenly Father for his wonderful favor and blessing on our lives. So, here it goes! Soon, I will be South Korea bound!

Outside the gates of Camp Casey

I recently found this YouTube Video that two Army Wives posted one year ago. I enjoyed watching this video because it allowed me to visualize a picture of where my husband is currently living. Having your husband in a different country and having no idea what kind of lifestyle he is living or what South Korea looks like is hard. This video helped give me a small picture of his life right now.

More Information on Camp Casey

    My husband Colt left January 3, 2011 for Camp Casey in South Korea. He is there for a 1 year hardship tour.

    Camp Casey is located forty miles North of Seoul, Korea in Tongduchon. Camp Casey has 3, 500 acres and is 1 of thirty eight U.S. Army posts in South Korea. Click here to find out more information about Camp Casey.

Frustrations

Colt has been doing field training at different bases throughout Korea over the last week. He will continue to train at a Korean base until the end of the month. Beginning in March he will do other forms of training and finally have a break around March 11th. He has yet to be able to leave the base and is ready to go experience the country and culture.

This has been the hardest part of our experience so far. Although I am thankful we are still able to text message throughout the day, we no longer are able to Skype. The most frustrating part is not being able to hold a conversation more than five minutes at a time. Colt is either exhausted from being up hours at a time, moving onto his next orders, or on a short break which causes our conversations to be very short. I understand that us communicating less is not his fault or his desire, but it still makes me frustrated. I am not frustrated because it is his fault, but I am frustrated because I miss his voice. I miss us laughing together and talking about anything and everything. Honestly, I miss everything. The most we get to talk about these days is "how was your day", "i love you", "i miss you", or rushing to get out important, exciting, or financial information before he is gone again. I know I need to be less selfish and more appreciative that I am even able to talk to my husband every day. I know there are so many other wives that rarely ever speak to their husbands when they are overseas.

I guess I am just having a moment. A moment of weakness. A moment of frustration. A moment of loneliness. I believe as human beings and army wives we are allowed to have these moments. I believe it is normal for everyone to have bad days every now and then. Unfortunately for me I have a hard time allowing myself to feel or express those emotions. I feel that if I allow those emotions to even remotely slip out I will never get back to the "positive state" I am in. Most people say occasionally you need to let the negative emotions come out because it is therapeutic, healthy, and relieves stress. Even though I agree, I guess part of you me is so scared to allow that to happen because I am afraid I won’t come back to my "happy place". So instead I hide behind my blanket of courage, strength, and peace because it is the only safe place I know. Even though I am scared to let the sad, negative, and lonely emotions out, I know there is a day where it will come. When that day arrives I am thankful to know that I have a Heavenly Father that I can trust to bring me back to the place of courage, strength, and peace...

Colt's Life in Korea

I recently asked my husband several questions about his new life in Korea. He explained that adjusting to the climate as well as being away from home have been hard, but he knows that living in Korea will be a memory he will never forget. The most interesting thing he has noticed about the culture so far is how nice all of the people are. He explained the Koreans are willing to help you out in any way possible. So far he has learned nothing significantly new about the Korean culture because they have not been able to leave the base and do much touring of the country yet. The biggest adjustment he has faced in Korea is being away from his wife and family. The hardest part about moving to a new country has been adjusting to the extremely cold climate. The relationships he has made with other people is what he likes most about Korea. The cold weather and being distant from his wife and family is what he likes least about living in Korea.